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Boyfriend struggles with aftermath of accident |
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Written by James Leonard | Patterson Irrigator
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Friday, 08 August 2008 |
“I lost my goal, my family … I don’t know what I’m going to do now.
I don’t know. I have no idea.”
— Baudelio Raygoza, boyfriend of Monica Martinez
 Courtesy photo When Baudelio Raygoza met Monica Martinez, he knew there was something different about her.
“She was a good girl,” he said. “I had some bad relationships — some of them might have done drugs and other things. This one was different. She never did drugs, never drank, never smoked. She was the good girl.”
Raygoza and Martinez were introduced through mutual friends and dated through MySpace while he was living in Arizona. Eventually, he moved to Gustine to live with his mother and to be with Martinez.
She was still married, but she had separated from her husband shortly after becoming pregnant with her now 3-year-old son, Eloy.
About two months ago, Martinez became pregnant with her second child — Raygoza’s first.
Raygoza had given Martinez a promise ring, and he found out Monday that he was getting a new job that would likely allow them to move in together.
But that night, Raygoza was driving behind Martinez when her car was hit head-on by an out-of-control SUV. Martinez and her son were killed when her car burst into flames.
It’s a scene Raygoza can’t stop replaying in his mind — or in his dreams.
“I take sleeping pills at night, because I don’t want to have nightmares,” he said. “In the morning, everything comes back and hits me. … I dream about Monica. I dream about the crash. It’s really bothering me a lot.”
Raygoza admits he feels angry and frustrated when he thinks about the accident, which happened when the oncoming SUV veered across the dividing line and into Martinez’s car.
But more frustrating than the accident itself is knowing that the dreams he had of their future together will never come to pass.
“I don’t know what to do now,” he said through tears Thursday morning. “I lost my goal, my family, you know what I mean? I don’t know what I’m going to do now. I don’t know. I have no idea.”
In the meantime, Raygoza finds brief moments of solace in happy memories. He thinks about Eloy and the connection they had formed, even in their brief time together.
“As soon as I opened the door, he’d (yell my name) and just run to the door and hug me at my legs,” Raygoza said. “He was happy to see me, like if I was his dad. I liked that feeling. Monica would always smile, like she was happy to see that.”
To contact James Leonard, call 892-6187 or e-mail him at
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